Do you remember your first experience with dating apps? I do! Actually, it changed my life entirely even though I didn’t really fall in love with anyone. At the moment, I’m a 33-year-old woman looking to date men of the same age or older, but my first experience with dating apps was around 10 years ago when I was in my 20s and living in Serbia.
I’ll be honest with you, when my friends first suggested looking for partners on a dating site, I felt like it was the last resort. At the time, dating sites weren’t as popular as they are now, especially not in Serbia, where I lived. I wasn’t expecting quality matches, and I felt embarrassed for even considering dating online. I’m so grateful that I eventually changed my mind and created an account on OkCupid because it made a huge difference in my life! I didn’t really consider other apps or try to find them, and even OkCupid was a recommendation from a guy I knew.
I really liked the fact that I needed to answer some interesting questions and complete personality tests to get the right matches. This approach seemed a lot better than just swiping right and left on pictures.
Once I finally saw the guys on OkCupid, I was pleasantly surprised. These guys seemed hot, fun, and interesting, not “desperate” as I first thought they’d be. There was one big problem, though… I lived in a small town in Serbia, and none of the guys were from my area. Now, so many years later, you can’t even use OkCupid anymore if you live in Serbia, which is disappointing. Back then, though, I found some guys from bigger cities in Serbia and started chatting. The guys were so great, and I had such amazing experiences! To this day, I have never met any one of them, but we exchanged many messages and had conversations that I’ll never forget.
I even tried being in a long-distance relationship with one of them, but it didn’t really work out. Still, I’m grateful for meeting these men online, and here are the 3 important things that I’ve learned from them:
1. Writing job
At the time, I didn’t have a job, and I had no idea what I would do for a living. Sure, I was a writer my whole life, but it was just a hobby, not a career. This is what I was talking about when I mentioned that dating online for the first time changed my life entirely. One of the first guys I met told me that he works as a writer. When I explained that I’m a writer too and expressed my desire to turn it into a career, he connected me with his client, and I got my first writing job!
Later, I also discovered platforms where I could work as a writer, and now I’m a successful freelance writer with over 5 years of experience. It’s actually over 10 years of experience, but I only count the years when my career was really successful. Anyway, that sweet guy from OkCupid opened up this world of online jobs for me, and I’m eternally grateful to him, even though we have never really met.
2. Steampunk and cosplay
My attempt at a long-distance relationship was with a very interesting, quirky guy who introduced me to steampunk music and style, as well as cosplay. “My Steampunk Collection” is one of my favorite playlists on YouTube, even now.
My hobbies include acting, so I also loved the idea of cosplay. This guy was nothing like the men from my hometown. He was much more interesting! He often traveled, and he lived abroad, in Portugal and other exotic countries. We actually talked in English before we realized that we’re both from Serbia, but still pretty far away from each other.
3. Polyamory and open relationships
There was something that many men had in common on OkCupid – many of them said that they were polyamorous and/or in open relationships. At the time, I didn’t know what polyamory really meant, but they were very happy to explain and teach me. To be honest, my first thought about polyamory was that it’s just an excuse to sleep with several people at the same time. However, they reassured me that this is about having feelings and a real relationship, just with several people instead of one. Is it possible to truly love more people at the same time? Maybe. Maybe I’m polyamorous too, I’m not sure anymore.
Those are just some of the interesting things I learned from online dating, so stay tuned and keep reading my stories to find out what else I learned over the years, and maybe you’ll also learn something useful from it!
