August 15, 2025
I had a really bad date last night, like the worst I could remember. I do meet strangers a lot, and it can be triggering because I’m not conventionally attractive – One memory that keeps with me is meeting someone when I was 18. It wasn’t even supposed to be a date, I was buying a textbook off him, but his face immediately and visually fell when he saw me.
I have an online dating profile that I feel mostly resembles what I look like in real life. Of course I choose my most flattering photos, as most people do. It’s like a resume, we are trying to sell and present ourselves in the most favourable light.
Erik, 36M, American. I got lost on the way to the restaurant he picked for us. And immediately when I arrived, he seemed disinterested and bored – Then after being seated, he refused to order any food. It’s not the first time a guy has done that and I wonder if they just don’t want to pay for it.
Well, I was hungry and would have been fine if he left immediately. I was going to sit there and eat my food and drink my beer even if I was alone.
Ironically I ended up paying our bill – He reached for it, but I sensed he didn’t want to be there and my portion was the majority of the cost, so I covered it. Also I didn’t want to prolong the date by fussing with the server to split out his beer. He didn’t even thank me.
We awkwardly walked on the seawall briefly. Most of our conversation centered around his experiences as an American foreigner living in Canada, especially in the current climate of hostilities. Also excitable about scifi but thinks Interstellar was a bad movie.
Sadly, I did find him attractive – He looks better in person than in his photos actually. He has long curly hair that I don’t like, but it looked good yesterday pulled into a low ponytail.
I received a message from him today saying he found me nice, but would be open to just being friends. I replied plainly that our date was extremely awkward and understood where he was coming from.
This experience did shake me a bit, but I’ve had a string of successful dates where the guys immediately recognized me and asked to see me again. So I am not 100% a gremlin. Thus I maintain my confidence to continue to try.
